Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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