Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
