I want to stick my p in your. b.
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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