I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
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