the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize
