We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
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