...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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