Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
