I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
