Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
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