Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
