Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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