the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
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