I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
