why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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