Just cropdusted the office
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
