this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
