So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
