If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
Randomize
