He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
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