That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
