He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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