All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
We had sex on a dog bed..
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
