Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
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