Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
