He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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