uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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