we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
