I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
