I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
