did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
