Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
