She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
third nipple confirmed
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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