you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
