The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
