my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
