garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
