You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
