He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
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