wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
