had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
