did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
