She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
