so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Randomize
