I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
