I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
The Olympian is in my bed
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