At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
40s are totally the cure
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
