A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
This is the high leading the old right now
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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