i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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