whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Randomize
