no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Randomize
